Love Me or Leave Me.

We had just met and you said I was beautiful
all that you said made me think you were wonderful
and we stayed up all night
and we talked about life
and you told me I was
beautiful

And then came that party, I met all your friends
there were pretty girls as thick as air
and the longer I stayed
the clearer it became
that you couldn't see me there

Don't treat me like I'm special if I'm not
and never will be
my heart just cannot take another shot
of jealousy
don't look at me like I'm your world
then look that way at another girl
I deserve better
don't have to believe me
but I can't live like this
so love me
or leave me

You say that I'm smart, I can tell that you mean it
you tell me I'm funny, I know you believe it
you're the kind of guy
who cannot tell a lie
and you don't know that you're
beautiful

But don't treat me like I'm special if I'm not
and never will be
my heart just cannot take another shot
of jealousy
don't look at me like I'm your world
then look that way at another girl
I deserve better
don't have to believe me
but I can't live like this
so love me
or leave me

So don't
make me laugh so much
and don't
smile when we touch
and don't
tell me that we can be friends
when it either begins or it ends

And don't treat me like I'm special if I'm not
and never will be
my heart just cannot take another shot
of jealousy
don't look at me like I'm your world
then look that way at another girl
I deserve better
don't have to believe me
but I can't live like this
so love me
or leave me

Sober

Hi. My name is Kim and I'm a love-aholic. I have been clean now for two months and six days.

Hi Kim.




I haven't cried myself to sleep in weeks. I have made new friends. I've been on dates. I've had

endless fun. I'm terrified of being alone. I have given my number to a dozen boys in the past two

weeks alone. I do what I want. I feel sexy. People like me. I hang out with guys. I talk to

strangers.

I'm terrified of being alone.



Today I was hanging out with the guy I've been spending pretty much all my time with since we

met a week and a half ago. A genuinely nice guy who's fun to be around and made me happy. His

sense of humor is about a thousand miles from family friendly, and he's the playboy poster child

for the NCMO movement (Non-Committal Make-Out). When he's not calling me kimmers, he's

calling me 'Rated G.' I promised myself when we first met that I wasn't going to fall for him.

Today as we were driving somewhere, he put his arm around me, causing my eyebrows to raise.

I'm not generally comfortable with pretty much any kind of physical contact with the opposite

sex. I glanced over and noticed that his other arm was around the two girls on the other side of

him, causing my eyebrows to lower considerably. I realized that what I minded was not

the arm around me, but the arm around the other girls. I removed his arm from my shoulders.

I don't think I'm going to hang out with him anymore.

You Never Could

Today I miss the way you'd kiss
my hand when I was mad at you
Tonight I miss the way your eyes
would look at me and see right through
my soul, how you could always make me laugh
you put up with my family on my behalf
how locked in your embrace I'd always felt so right
and how we'd always end up on the phone all night

But I will never ever miss the way
you always had to be a couple hours late
and how you never called me

I miss how you would smile nervously
when I saw you stare at me
I miss the ways we spent our days
and how you said I set you free

But I will never ever miss the nights
I laid awake still crying from our latest fight
and how you never called me
And I will never miss those awful days
I came to you and you just pushed me away
how you looked right through me

I'll never miss the way you never could miss me.

On nights like these I cannot seem to stop these tears
You understand just why my head is a mess
when at the end of all those perfect broken years
you left me waiting in that long white dress...

And I still miss the way you'd kiss my hand
when I was mad at you
but please don't try to call me

I'll never miss the way you never could miss me.